Sunday, November 7

Bloopers of its Kind

Through this blog, I would like to share some of my experience/bloopers/blunders/accidents, i faced, during my stay in Germany.

On arrival at Frankfurt Airport:

At the airport, German staff at the VISA verification office, asked my dear Indian but yet not so Indian colleague, “KYA HAAL HAI” in German accent.

My friend from Chennai replied: “Sorry, I do not understand GERMAN.”

Work timesheet filling:

At work, asked my colleague in Germany to fill my ontime (work timesheet) with the status as “WORKING IN SHIFTS.”

Dude filled it as, “WORKING IN SHITS.”

Day Light Saving Time (DST):

Started from room at 5:15 AM to catch 5:50 AM tram which has a usual runtime of every one hour on weekends, ended up at the station at 4:50 AM thanks to Day Light Saving (DST).

Thank god we do not have DST in India. Trust me guys, it’s a MESS.

Wondering what happens if DST shifts time by 12 hours forward/backward?

At the Shop:

Day 1:

At the Shop counter,

Me (In English): “is this toothpaste?”

(There wasn't anything mentioned on the tube in english which says about its toothpaste characteristics...not even the word ‘TOOTHPASTE’.

Everything was German.)

The only fact I knew was, that the paste was placed in the same section where other dental stuff was present.

The dilemma whether to buy or not and check out for other alternatives, was trounced by the idea of tomorrow's situation to brush without paste keeping in mind the fact that no other shop was available in vicinity.

I once again asked the lady at the counter with tube in one hand and virtual brush made from my right hand finger held close to my mouth, “is this a tooth paste???”

Lady: “Ja, Ja (for yes), No Anglais!!!”

Me: “Oh, German….No English…Francais, Francais? (as if I knew French very well)!!!”

Lady: “Nein, Nein (for NO), German, German…no Francais!!!”
Me: “Tooth Paste” (literally rubbing my teeth with my finger)

Lade: Ja, Ja, toothpaste!!!

Me: “thankyou…bubye.”

I got back to the room.

Day 2:

Brushed with this new toothpaste the next day. Oh no!!! Blood all over my mouth. Googled the contents online for this brand.

Ooops, the tooth paste read “ANIMAL TOOTH ACHE” !!!

(phewwww....!)

Thursday, August 26

Inked!!!

Times, a thing assumed so parochial when observed from periphery actually turns out to be so radical and fundamental in practice.

No matter how hard one tries to abstain from it, make it sit in one corner of the brain, it does spur one fine day and gives you a reality check.

The entire running away thing soon turns out to be ‘a thing of the past’.

My Advice: Do what your heart says not the people!!!


OKAY!!!

I finally did it, yes got myself inked!!!

I longed to do this from times immemorial (owing to the yes/no advices given by the mouths around).

I had my first tattoo done and was inked for rest of my life!!!

This dates back to days when I was in Chennai and came across this ink shop, our very own desi version of LA Ink!!!

I checked in and enquired.

Reason why I wanted a tattoo: primarily, I considered it cool to have one and the only way people start differentiating between twins (secondary reason ... off course)!

Jokes apart.

Apprehensions whether to get it done or not, threats of AIDS/HIV infection, non-sterilized needles, too expensive a tattoo etc were visible all over my face.

After a long wait and making up my mind, finally I got a chance to get my first tattoo done when I was in Johannesburg in 2009.

How should the first tattoo look like?

What design should it be?

What am I most fond/scared of?

...

...

Girlfriend’s name, my own name...

...

Etc etc

After a series of unending, undying questions about what my tattoo should be all about, I filtered and closed my heart for an OM tattoo.

Why OM?

Well, I am god fearing person, who thinks, some super natural force omnipresent to take care of me and so I believe nothing but OM is the only link to replace this feeling.

I incised the tattoo on my arm.

Why arm?

I always wanted to get a tattoo done on my arm so that it’s always visible. The other reason was I was afraid of prickling pain of piercing needles in other body parts (At least my arm had enough muscle to stand the pain).

My colleague (Vin) at work took me to a tattoo shop in Johannesburg.

Work reminds me of an incident when another colleague got in a verbal confrontation with Vin over provoking me to get a tattoo done. Now this colleague had a very different perception about tattoo. As per him, no artificial thing can replace the natural magnificence of god and a tattoo doesn't lasts forever as you grow old your body wrinkles.

So he strongly oppose to my idea of getting tattoo on my body!!!

But, I had already made up my mind to go ahead and now there was no turning back for me.

One thing I figured out from this incident is, we humans are very similar in thinking, no matter which part of world we belong to. Not only in India but people in other parts of the world still find tattoo ink not good, a no-reason-to-waste-money and leave a callisthenic scar on your body or may be, to be in a state of masochism.

Without further extending this post, let me show you the work I got done on my arm for the rest of my life.

Tuesday, April 20

My thoughts Tonight....

I see my life as a blank page from the past where too much has already been scribbled on by the so called destiny, or god or whatever one calls it, and is written in such a fashion that no two sentences make sense together.

I see myself as a frail rot, someone who dreamt dreams in galore waiting for them to relish one by one but are still jammed in to embark one.

My pals feel the kind of work and life I have is very uncommon and not everyone is lucky enough to have one. But I hate myself for this messed up, transitory but long lasting moment, this life I live, which looks perky and luxurious but quite precarious and extinct from within.

Ironically, knowing all the facts and still pursuing this life has not only become too monotonous but quite mechanized obsession for me. I characterize myself for being nothing less to a ZOMBIE!!!

I know about this and yet I cannot change it. It’s not I don’t try; it’s just that I fail before I even try.

Is it the dissatisfaction feel I get in whatever I do, is it I am not interested in doing what I do, or is it the relativity of the name, money that either the society or I seeks to sink into my brain when I compare myself to my acquaintances for the kind of life they live and envy about it, is it something inexplicable but predictable about the whole situation which urges me to scribble tonight. Whatever it is, it’s like a termite that just wants to eat me in and out!!!

Every night before I go to sleep, a haunted cord strikes telling me about the moth life I posses wherein I get slowly pushed to the negative radiance of “meaningless life”. I do not struggle to fight back for the survival instead be a defeated warrior who lost the battle long before it got started.

I pour all my thoughts here because, sometimes I feel, I stammer to say all this to others and do not expect someone to listen about all this. So the bottom line still remains the same, that, “no matter where I am, what I am doing, I am still waiting to smell real SATISFACTION!!!”

Read what happened when i met William and his family in South Africa here.

Monday, March 15

Atta Ka Halwa

Experiment: Atta ka halwa

Time required preparing this dish: depends on the mood and interest but otherwise 30 mins.

Time N Location of preparation: 13 March 2010, Johannesburg (IPL 3.0 on T.V., Delhi Daredevils V/s Punjab King XI)

Reason: Punjab’s disastrous batting.

Kitchen Setup: 2 cups water, 0.5 cup sugar, 1.5 tbsp. ghee, 1.5 cups atta (wheat flour), crushed almonds and lot of patience.

Note: To be made on conditions, either when you (especially the bachelors) are alone at home or grounded by your beloved or mom or friends for some unimaginable reason and is novice in cooking stuff well beyond imagination.

This one is the easiest and most readily prepared item which does not involve brains at all and one feels like investing some time whereas the ground check is…it’s a shear fritter.

So, dudes & dudette, who do not deny the fact that cooking is actually a rocket science, enjoy this recipe as I take immense pleasure in killing your time both mentally and physically in reading this blog and preparing this dish later on. LOL

Served for: Well, when I finished making it, turned out to be served for 4 but if you want to make it for a bigger gathering, please refer GOOGLE.

Apparatus: a big and a small vessel.

Procedure:

1. Add 2 cup water and half cup sugar in a small vessel and heat it until you get a sugar concentrate.

2. After 10 minutes, flame another vessel and heat 1.5 tbsp. ghee in it.

3. Add 1.5 cup wheat flour into the vessel holding ghee and mix it well.

4. Very important, mix well, till you see atta turns brownish (like I was seeing the target to defend against the Daredevils).

Generally, it takes 12-15 mins. to turn brown. [“Generally” word here is very deceptive, as I’ve prepared this halwa only once in my life but trust me it came out good and was a success]

5. Add the sugar concentrate to the atta vessel and keep blending it till the entire sugar water concentrate mix well with atta.

6. Mix it for 15 mins. And add crushed almonds to it.

It’s ready to serve now.

Please let me know if you try this and how was the experience and what all challenges you faced by adding your valuable comments to this blog.

P.S: will be coming out with more non creative recipes now and then.

Till then, Chao and enjoy the halwa.

Friday, February 26

200

24th Feb 2010, ‘a Wednesday’, has not only become a significant day in
the lives of more than a billion people but will also be remembered as the most important day in the golden books of history.

What has happened today will be penned in the history for the first and may be, for the last time.

One man changed the way the game was played, the way the world looked at him and will look now on.

Rarely someone is infatuated with this extraordinary ability to affect so many lives infinite times, besides the fact, the same person does not carve any blood bonds to millions and millions of people around him but still manages to be part of each and every soul and touch their hearts with immense emotions .

A "COMMON MAN", no matter he’s a daily wage worker, a waiter, an office going individual, a middle class guy or a beggar, feels elated, full of pride when they see him walk in, representing the voice of the whole nation, as, a “one-man-army” rebel against the odds and feel oneself fortunate enough to be part of the same era in which the legend is born. He’s someone who’s got the power, the charisma to make an unconnected someone, smile even in their downfall. His presence is considered blessings for all.

The world transformed him from a normal human being to a star genius to a legend to a ‘doused fire’ but ‘HE’ never gave up, fought against the odds no matter how tough the journey was, he testified and proved them all incorrect, for, he stands out of the realm of definitions today.

The same world tags him today as a demigod, an incarnation of god on this planet and “no-nonsense human being.” He’s been an exception in himself, invincible, an untouchable figure alive today to conquer such heights none has dare to dream!!!

The more we talk about him just falls short of the more he does on the field.

He’s none other than the legendary, one and only to drew first blood, master of masters, master blaster, icon of icons, sportsman (cricketer) of the century, the little genius, born to rule the world and be an undisputed king of the game, the most humble human in history, the Jesus of cricket's bible, the epitome of perfection, a proud INDIAN, "SACHIN TENDULKAR.”

If someone asks:

Q. Define “Pressure” in cricket?
A. The millions of hopes put on SACHIN TENDULKAR per run he scores.

P.S : you can wish Sachin on his bday here.

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